For the past couple of years I've intentionally ignored Mother's Day. Primarily because I didn't need yet another reminder that I'd lost my mom, but more recently because I wasn't a mom myself...yet.
This year I'm physically different in a good way, but Mother's Day is still a painful reminder of how much I miss my mom, so my plan was treat it as any other typical Sunday...just business as usual. My well-intentioned family and friends didn't let that happen. I received lots of nice texts, cards, gifts, etc. with Happy Mommy-To-Be messages. It was so sweet and thoughtful of them, but mentally I wasn't quite ready to handle all of it.
I graciously accepted all the well-wishes, but it really made me look back and reflect on things. Primarily on how far I've come through the whole IF process (I chose to still ignore Mother's Day when relating to my mom). I realized just how painful it is for those trying for a baby (regardless if it's through natural methods, ART, adoption, etc.) to be surrounded by constant reminders of mommies for an entire day. My heart goes out to all those trying, and please know I was thinking about all of you!
Monday, May 9, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
The good and the bad
I had my follow-up ultrasound and doc appointment this morning. It's mostly good news with a little not-so-good sprinkled in to keep me on my toes.
The good news is the pain was caused by the fibroids and definitely not appendicitis or pre-term labor. The Woowoo also flipped himself over so he's head down now. It's still so early that it's not a big deal, but regardless I hope he stays that way!
The not-so-good news is that there are double the amount of fibroids than they originally counted. I now have 6 annoying fibroids hanging out on my uterus. Some of them are degenerating which is causing all the pain. The pain has subsided a lot, but is definitely still present. I asked the doctor what I can expect for the remainder of the pregnancy and he said there isn't a definite answer. He did say, most women experience the worst of it now through the next 2-4 weeks and then it should get better. Fabulous...right when Hubby and I are taking our babymoon.
The most important thing is that there is no harm to Woowoo, just pain for momma. But I'll deal with it knowing my baby is still growing big and strong in my belly:)
Thanks for all the thoughts!
The good news is the pain was caused by the fibroids and definitely not appendicitis or pre-term labor. The Woowoo also flipped himself over so he's head down now. It's still so early that it's not a big deal, but regardless I hope he stays that way!
The not-so-good news is that there are double the amount of fibroids than they originally counted. I now have 6 annoying fibroids hanging out on my uterus. Some of them are degenerating which is causing all the pain. The pain has subsided a lot, but is definitely still present. I asked the doctor what I can expect for the remainder of the pregnancy and he said there isn't a definite answer. He did say, most women experience the worst of it now through the next 2-4 weeks and then it should get better. Fabulous...right when Hubby and I are taking our babymoon.
The most important thing is that there is no harm to Woowoo, just pain for momma. But I'll deal with it knowing my baby is still growing big and strong in my belly:)
Thanks for all the thoughts!
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
An unexpected doctor's visit
I got to see my sweet boy again yesterday morning...unscheduled.
Over the weekend I had some general discomfort/pressure in my lower abdominal region, mostly on my right side. I didn't really think much of it and figured it was just more growing pains. I woke up for work Monday morning and all hell broke loose. I was in the shower doubled over in pain that was sharp, stabby and then would turn to constant and achy. Regardless of the type of pain, it was pain! Pain to the point I could barely walk.
I finished my shower, toweled off and hobbled into the bedroom where Hubby was just waking up. He sat bolt upright when he saw my face and I broke down in tears and simply said "I don't feel well." He was very calm and reassuring and asked what hurt, if I was spotting, and if I'd felt the baby. Thank God for his calm reaction. I was a basket case and on the brink of total meltdown at that point. He gently pointed out that it might be the fibriods causing the problems. I was so worried it was the Woowoo it never crossed my mind that it might be fibriods.
Anyway, I calmed down, got dressed and settled into the couch to wait for the docs office to open. As soon as I reached them I spoke to the midwife, told her what the problems were and she scheduled me to go in for a visit. One of the benefits of living 6 blocks from your OB/GYN is the ability to go in immediately. Within an hour I was explaining my symptoms to Dr. G (who I met for the first time and LOVED!). The first thing she did was have me lie back and turned on the sound on the ultrasound machine. I heard the tiny heartbeat and immediately started crying. I can usually keep it together better than that, but I was so scared for my Woowoo that I couldn't have controlled my emotions if I tried. She was so comforting and told me he looked great. He was kicking up a storm in my belly. Never in my life have those little kicks been so welcome!
After a lot of painful probing, prodding and poking Dr G. felt the pain was coming from one of the fibroids in the lower right area of my abdomen. But, she didn't rule out appendicitis. She consulted with Dr. R. and he agreed that it was most likely the fibroid. She gave me a pain medicine prescription (not harmful to the baby) and scheduled a follow-up for Thursday morning.
I went home mentally and emotionally exhausted, ate lunch, took my pain med and slept the rest of the afternoon. I'm back at work today, but still in quite a bit of pain. Somehow I'm able to deal with the pain knowing my sweet baby is OK and not at all affected by my fibroid. In fact, he's so unfazed by it that he keeps kicking me in that area!
I will say I am so, so thankful to be under the care of the doctors at my practice. They put me totally at ease and knew my biggest concern was making sure the baby was OK. It's nice to know I have doctors who care and "get it".
Now, if only the pain would go away...
Over the weekend I had some general discomfort/pressure in my lower abdominal region, mostly on my right side. I didn't really think much of it and figured it was just more growing pains. I woke up for work Monday morning and all hell broke loose. I was in the shower doubled over in pain that was sharp, stabby and then would turn to constant and achy. Regardless of the type of pain, it was pain! Pain to the point I could barely walk.
I finished my shower, toweled off and hobbled into the bedroom where Hubby was just waking up. He sat bolt upright when he saw my face and I broke down in tears and simply said "I don't feel well." He was very calm and reassuring and asked what hurt, if I was spotting, and if I'd felt the baby. Thank God for his calm reaction. I was a basket case and on the brink of total meltdown at that point. He gently pointed out that it might be the fibriods causing the problems. I was so worried it was the Woowoo it never crossed my mind that it might be fibriods.
Anyway, I calmed down, got dressed and settled into the couch to wait for the docs office to open. As soon as I reached them I spoke to the midwife, told her what the problems were and she scheduled me to go in for a visit. One of the benefits of living 6 blocks from your OB/GYN is the ability to go in immediately. Within an hour I was explaining my symptoms to Dr. G (who I met for the first time and LOVED!). The first thing she did was have me lie back and turned on the sound on the ultrasound machine. I heard the tiny heartbeat and immediately started crying. I can usually keep it together better than that, but I was so scared for my Woowoo that I couldn't have controlled my emotions if I tried. She was so comforting and told me he looked great. He was kicking up a storm in my belly. Never in my life have those little kicks been so welcome!
After a lot of painful probing, prodding and poking Dr G. felt the pain was coming from one of the fibroids in the lower right area of my abdomen. But, she didn't rule out appendicitis. She consulted with Dr. R. and he agreed that it was most likely the fibroid. She gave me a pain medicine prescription (not harmful to the baby) and scheduled a follow-up for Thursday morning.
I went home mentally and emotionally exhausted, ate lunch, took my pain med and slept the rest of the afternoon. I'm back at work today, but still in quite a bit of pain. Somehow I'm able to deal with the pain knowing my sweet baby is OK and not at all affected by my fibroid. In fact, he's so unfazed by it that he keeps kicking me in that area!
I will say I am so, so thankful to be under the care of the doctors at my practice. They put me totally at ease and knew my biggest concern was making sure the baby was OK. It's nice to know I have doctors who care and "get it".
Now, if only the pain would go away...
Sunday, May 1, 2011
21 weeks and pictures
I'm 21w1d today and I still can't believe it! I guess these pictures and the karate kicks the baby has been giving me are my reminders:)
The Woowoo was being a little shy for the 4-D image so all we can see is his little mouth, but I love the regular ultra sound pic because you see his little hand in his mouth. And of course, I've put up a pic of me at 20 weeks.
Enjoy the rest of the weekend!
The Woowoo was being a little shy for the 4-D image so all we can see is his little mouth, but I love the regular ultra sound pic because you see his little hand in his mouth. And of course, I've put up a pic of me at 20 weeks.
Enjoy the rest of the weekend!
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Halfway
I can't believe it, but I'm already 20w4d. I have no clue where the time has gone. I'm still up to my eyeballs in freelance work, but I keep reminding myself that it's going to pay for my extra 4 weeks of maternity leave I want to take. It's all for the baby:) Because I've still been a bad blogger I'm going with the bullets...again. I know, they're getting old.
•We had a 20-week appt and second anatomy scan on Monday. Everything went really well. The Woowoo (or Baby Will as we call him now) is growing just like he's supposed to. He's still measuring a few days ahead and is a chubby little guy weighing in at 14oz (80th percentile). He's breech but that doesn't stop him from being a little wiggle worm.
• I started to feel him kick around 18 weeks, but Hubby was able to feel him Monday morning before our appt for the first time. Most mornings, if I lay flat in bed, I can feel his little legs kicking me. I love it. Ask me again in six weeks if I still love it and I might have a different answer, but now it's the highlight of my day.
•I have still three fibroids in me, but they've gotten a bit smaller which is a good thing. Dr. Goo.gle has told me they can go away during pregnancy and I'm hoping mine do! But the fibroids are giving me the chance to see Baby Will every 4 weeks because the docs want to monitor their size.
•I've gained 11lbs so far and my bump is still small, but the doc said this is totally normal for my height and activity level. So screw all the people who keep judging me on not eating enough. Trust me folks, I'm eating for two! I've still been running (well ok, run/walking) twice a week and with the warmer weather I'm still loving it. I've had some minor hip discomfort towards the end of the runs, but the doc said that was to be expected as I get bigger and my joints start to widen and loosen even more. I'm also trying to do a yoga class once a week and throwing in a session with my trainer and elliptical so I'm definitely keeping active.
•I'm amazed at how much my body changes from day to day. Some of the changes I love (seeing my belly grow bigger with my sweet boy) and some not so much (the red, itchy bumps I've got on my abdomen and chest just in time for summer and lower cut shirts).
•Regardless, seeing my belly reminds me just how thankful I am to be in the position I'm in. I haven't forgotten all the pain, tears, worry, frustration and anger I felt going through the process to get here. I'm experiencing some of it again as my sis-in-law is going through a similar situation. My heart aches for her and I'm trying to be as much of a comfort to her as she'll let me be. I'm also reminded of all my blogger friends who are still struggling with their own IF issues. I am not taking any of this for granted and try to remember everyday what a gift it really is!
Hopefully I'll have baby and baby bump pictures up in another day or two. I need Hubby to scan the baby pics first!
•We had a 20-week appt and second anatomy scan on Monday. Everything went really well. The Woowoo (or Baby Will as we call him now) is growing just like he's supposed to. He's still measuring a few days ahead and is a chubby little guy weighing in at 14oz (80th percentile). He's breech but that doesn't stop him from being a little wiggle worm.
• I started to feel him kick around 18 weeks, but Hubby was able to feel him Monday morning before our appt for the first time. Most mornings, if I lay flat in bed, I can feel his little legs kicking me. I love it. Ask me again in six weeks if I still love it and I might have a different answer, but now it's the highlight of my day.
•I have still three fibroids in me, but they've gotten a bit smaller which is a good thing. Dr. Goo.gle has told me they can go away during pregnancy and I'm hoping mine do! But the fibroids are giving me the chance to see Baby Will every 4 weeks because the docs want to monitor their size.
•I've gained 11lbs so far and my bump is still small, but the doc said this is totally normal for my height and activity level. So screw all the people who keep judging me on not eating enough. Trust me folks, I'm eating for two! I've still been running (well ok, run/walking) twice a week and with the warmer weather I'm still loving it. I've had some minor hip discomfort towards the end of the runs, but the doc said that was to be expected as I get bigger and my joints start to widen and loosen even more. I'm also trying to do a yoga class once a week and throwing in a session with my trainer and elliptical so I'm definitely keeping active.
•I'm amazed at how much my body changes from day to day. Some of the changes I love (seeing my belly grow bigger with my sweet boy) and some not so much (the red, itchy bumps I've got on my abdomen and chest just in time for summer and lower cut shirts).
•Regardless, seeing my belly reminds me just how thankful I am to be in the position I'm in. I haven't forgotten all the pain, tears, worry, frustration and anger I felt going through the process to get here. I'm experiencing some of it again as my sis-in-law is going through a similar situation. My heart aches for her and I'm trying to be as much of a comfort to her as she'll let me be. I'm also reminded of all my blogger friends who are still struggling with their own IF issues. I am not taking any of this for granted and try to remember everyday what a gift it really is!
Hopefully I'll have baby and baby bump pictures up in another day or two. I need Hubby to scan the baby pics first!
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Thank you
Thanks for the kind, reassuring comments everyone left! While I do know I'm eating enough and growing at the rate my body and baby want me to, it's always comforting to hear from other people who've gone through (or are going through) similar situations.
Everyone has a different experience with pregnancy and I need to keep reminding myself of that. I'm just happy to finally feel pregnant as opposed to just fat the way I did a few weeks ago. It still amazes me how quickly my body is changing!
Everyone has a different experience with pregnancy and I need to keep reminding myself of that. I'm just happy to finally feel pregnant as opposed to just fat the way I did a few weeks ago. It still amazes me how quickly my body is changing!
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
There really is a baby in my belly
I've had three co-workers come up to me and say "oh, now I can see that you're pregnant!". Hmmm, how should I take that statement? My typical response is "yep, there really is a baby in my belly." I know they mean well, but I think that's an odd thing to say. My initial thought it to take it as a criticism that I'm not as big as I should be at this stage.
This is my first baby, I'm tall (5'8"), fairly thin and still working out regularly, so I've only recently popped (and I still feel like it's too early for me to "pop"...I'm 17w4d). I keep reminding myself that as long as my doctor says the baby is fine and growing the way he should, I don't need to worry about other people's perceptions of my belly and pregnancy in general. Easier said than done...
I'm probably being overly sensitive about this, but my emotions seem to be on a roller coaster lately and I have no clue whose doing the driving because I'm definitely not. Anyway, I'm going to make my blog photo debut and post a bump pic from last week when I was 16w3d. I'd say the "popping" has occurred over the weekend so I look bigger now than I did in this pic.
Regardless of peoples comments and my reactions to them, I'm falling more and more in love with Woowoo everyday:)
This is my first baby, I'm tall (5'8"), fairly thin and still working out regularly, so I've only recently popped (and I still feel like it's too early for me to "pop"...I'm 17w4d). I keep reminding myself that as long as my doctor says the baby is fine and growing the way he should, I don't need to worry about other people's perceptions of my belly and pregnancy in general. Easier said than done...
I'm probably being overly sensitive about this, but my emotions seem to be on a roller coaster lately and I have no clue whose doing the driving because I'm definitely not. Anyway, I'm going to make my blog photo debut and post a bump pic from last week when I was 16w3d. I'd say the "popping" has occurred over the weekend so I look bigger now than I did in this pic.
Regardless of peoples comments and my reactions to them, I'm falling more and more in love with Woowoo everyday:)
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